Heston, Christmas Pudding, Early Birds, Worms
Taking a rare visit away from the the bins behind Lidl, to the even rarer air of Waitrose (they left the tradesman's entrance open, so managed to dodge the doorman - I was wearing jeans), Mrs C and I spotted the extremely rare Heston Blumenthal Christmas Pudding with "hidden orange".
As there weren't thousands of banshee-like "sevenoaks mums" scrabbling over the few that were still on the shelf, Mrs C and I started to have doubts that this was indeed the lesser-spotted Heston Christmas Pud that was selling for thousands of pounds on fleabay last year?
Was this not the famous, secret handshake to a successful and prosperous Christmas, just sitting there waiting to be put in our trolley?
Worse, are they last year's El Dorado ? So therefore it would be extremely unfashionable to even give it a passing glance, in case we're spotted.
Or are we so early that the vultures haven't yet smelled blood (or hidden orange)?
Is there anything else that we should be grabbing now, before it's too late?