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Crummy Joke

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Benedict_Arnold's picture
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Police are reporting major dispruption on the M3.

Apparently a WH Smith articulated lorry and one belonging to Rymans were involved in a collision.

All southbound lanes of the motorway are said to be stationery.

CnoEvil's picture
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RE: Crummy Joke

A3 and A4 on the M3, so to speak.

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RE: Crummy Joke

doh!

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RE: Crummy Joke

I have a friend who always wanted to run over by a steam train.

When it happened, he was chuffed to bits.

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RE: Crummy Joke

The Metropolitan Police are baffled by a spate of toilet pan thefts from their stations.

Chief Inspector Knacker said CID have nothing to go on at present...

fr0g's picture
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RE: Crummy Joke

My missus is so fat I had to put an energy saving bulb in the fridge...

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RE: Crummy Joke

fr0g wrote:
My missus is so fat I had to put an energy saving bulb in the fridge...

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whiskywheels's picture
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RE: Crummy Joke

[EDITED BY MODS - enough of that nonsense, please]

fr0g's picture
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RE: Crummy Joke

A study has shown that 40% of UK toddlers can already use an iPad.

That's nothing to the 90% of Chinese toddlers that already know how to make one...

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Alec's picture
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RE: Crummy Joke

spiny norman wrote:

fr0g wrote:
My missus is so fat I had to put an energy saving bulb in the fridge...

Used to live reet near him.

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RE: Crummy Joke

What do you call a dinosaur that has just been EDITED? Smile  (0r another way kicked up the bum?)

 

Answer:  Megasaurass

 

Smile

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RE: Crummy Joke

I have a friend who's a shepherd. I said "That's a lot of sheep, how many have you got?". "97" He said.

"Can you help me round them up?" "Yes" I said "100" :grin:

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RE: Crummy Joke

I was in a pet shop yesterday, I asked the guy if I could buy a wasp.

"We don't sell wasps" he said

"Well there's one in your window" I said.

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RE: Crummy Joke

A man goes into a dentist.

"How can I help you sir?" says the dentist.

"Well, I keep thinking I'm a moth"

"Sir, this is a dentist, I think you need the psychiatrist down the corridor. Why did you come in here?"

"Your light was on" 

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RE: Crummy Joke

Very funny joke by Sir Clement Freud

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RE: Crummy Joke

 2 Eskimos were paddling across a lake one day, when they got cold and built a small fire to keep warm...It sunk.

 

Just goes to show you can't have your kayak and heat it.

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